How can you reframe one of your biggest regrets in life? I stumbled into this question today and thought it would be interesting to write something about it. Honestly, I couldn't think of a specific thing that I would consider THE biggest regret. Is that a bad thing? I firmly believe that there was always a reason as to why I may have not taken a "big" step towards something. At least there is nothing that I can think of for now but maybe there'd be an idea that will popup in my head as I ponder this question for a few days - I know my brain will just randomly think of this question passively. I'd be back for another entry by then.
There's so many facets in life that I think if we categorize them, there's probably a thing or two that I have regretted not doing in the past but nothing that could negate the life at present anyway. But for the sake of writing in this journal and answering this question, the most recent thought I have was about music. When I was growing up, music was a part of my every day life. No, the members of my family are not musical artists, but they surely love listening to music. The stereo would be playing from morning until night time. There were lots of cassette tapes to choose from - folk songs, love songs, ballad to rock, you name it. There were also cassette tapes recorded from a radio which my siblings have made. You know those grey tapes in which you can write on the sides which songs have been recorded in it. I think you can even "overwrite" the music in it too.
I loved playing the stereo so much that I memorised all the radio stations in my city. I would tune in to each radio station starting from frequencies 88.3 to 107.5 in a day - I would call each radio station if I can and request my favourite song or a song that fits in the type of music they play at a specific time slot. I even won a prize that I never intended to win - when I called the radio station, the DJ had just asked the listeners to call to participate on the raffle. I just happened to tune in, called to request for my favourite song to be played, and the DJ had thought I'd participate on the question and answer. I wasn't but he told me the answer to his question anyway prior to being on-air. I agreed to participate as long as he would play my song and I could greet my friends on-air. I won a deodorant apparently, but I never claimed the prize. I told my sister about what happened, and she laughed so hard because I was even too young to use it.
I would listen to any music though my preference is alternative rock. I was heavily influenced by my brothers who always listen to rock, then my sisters influenced me to listen to pop, then there's the folk and ballads from my parents. I listened to everything - even the radio drama that plays at 2 pm. I even wanted to become a disk jockey just so I could play music all day!
I learned the acoustic guitar when I was young, then I was part of the ukelele club. My father bought me a ukelele, flute, and harmonica - and I remember enjoying my afternoons just playing music from those instruments.
Then there were the cds, digital formats played on media players like Winamp, then mp3, ipods, etc. My music taste evolved so much over the years. I remember being a part of a school band in which I played the rhythm guitar. We played at the battle of the bands at my school, we did not win but it was a great experience for me and my friends. I loved it!
So here comes my regret. Around this time, in high school, I had the pleasure of having quick access to either drum sets, keyboards, bass and guitar - electric or acoustic. We have them at home - it was my brothers since they both can play anything. So around this time, I really wanted to learn how to play the drums. I would play it with random beats, but at some point, it just does not sound great. Here's the thing, I never really went to "study" how to play a musical instrument. It was always me trying to "figure it out". Guitar can be self-taught - I did it - although I would still consider myself a beginner, I can still play a bit here and there for fun.
Now that I am older, I have always wonder how the heck did I not learn how to play the drums, the keyboards, the bass. I had the privilege of learning it, but I guess at the time, it did not appeal that much to me. And I guess at the time, I cannot play anything else cos "I play the guitar among my friend group". I don't know exactly the reason why though. That I probably have taken it for granted that it was just there - in the corner of our living room - and it can wait for me when I am ready for it. I never did. I grew up, moved and worked abroad, and only visit home once a year, then I moved farther away abroad. Now that I am in my 30s, I regret not playing it so much.
How do I reframe it? Well, I don't have a drum set here with me - I can still daydream about it until I get my hands on it - but my husband and I bought a new electric stratocaster. And I am so excited in re-learning to play again. I may not be part of a school band anymore, but it's been far too long that I got my hands in an instrument that I have to have it. I am re-learning again every day. My husband learns with me too. He has not played a guitar ever, so we're both taking lessons as I wanted to learn with him - start from the beginning again. He is so ecstatic that he learned a riff or two already! I love that we're learning something together, too. So while I will forever have the regret of not learning the other musical instruments when I was younger, at least I will make it up now in re-learning the guitar and actually be better at it. Intentionally learning it. My husband is planning to take his old keyboard from his parents home soon, so he can play this again too and he can teach me. I love that we're learning together, and while life is busier now that we're older, I'll make sure that we enjoy spending a few minutes in a day learning music together even though we're only playing for ourselves and some family/friends.
